Munchkin #1 is trying out college. She is half way through week two and it still feels a little strange. Strange to me, as Mom, anyway. We made it through 18 years without any type of formal schooling and now she's jumped in with both feet. She's got a daily schedule with someone else making recomendations for how she fills her time for several hours each day. I wasn't sure she was going to tolerate the lack of freedom for the first few days, but she seems determined to give it at least a semester's try.
I have to admit that I've encountered a few moments of anxiety, but mostly I've struggled with what probably amounts to excessive pride. I have resisted the desire to say, "pblttttt... I told you so," to those who may have suggested a time or two that I couldn't possibly know that she was learning what she was supposed to know because, you know, I didn't have tests and worksheets and drills to back it up. I've also resisted (well, I guess up until this moment) the urge to yell, "In your face!" regarding the ACT benchmark test scores recently reported for our state. And yes, I'm ashamed for counting and keeping track at all.
I don't know that she's going to have an altogether easy time with school, but I know she will do fine if she decides college is where she wants to be. And if/then, she'll be fine with whatever else she decides, as well. I honestly can't imagine what that might be, at the moment, but I do trust she will fill me in as the time is right. In the meantime, I find myself missing her at odd moments, and being filled with a kind of overwhelming giddiness when it is almost time for her to be home again. I am trying to resist the urge to beg for all the details of her day.
There's something very satisfying about seeing her take these steps, however, and I know that we have turned a parent/child corner. There's no going back. She's a young woman. She's full of confidence. She's trying things out. She makes my heart swell with pride.
Then again, I guess that's nothing new.